When I was a student of mathematics, the guess and check method was always my LEAST favorite way of solving any problem. It was so much work - the guessing AND the checking, the reguessing AND the rechecking. My paper would wind up looking like a total bloodbath of numbers and ink. It was always a last resort for me. I'd try anything else first even if it wasn't situationally appropriate -hmmm, what if I rewrote this math problem in iambic pentameter?!? I was so relieved to get to college, major in English, and leave guess and check in the past - words rule, numbers drool.
Little did I know that good, 'ole G & C would make a roaring and irrefutable comeback when I became a parent. See, in the hospital they give you this baby. Maybe some swaddling blankets. That's it. There's no mathematical formula. There's no algebraic equation. Just a baby whose needs you need to figure out PRONTO. Like #38 on Math II of the SATs, but with more at stake. And this baby is just about as helpful as #38 in terms of providing any hints as to what the right path might be. At least in math problems, there are certain key words that tell you your operation. Unlike #38, you don't even know what the problem you're trying to solve is half the time. Baby's crying? Is it hungry? sitting in poop? cutting a tooth? just messing with you? Once you do figure it out, damned if they are going to tell you how to solve your particular problem. It's guess and check time!
"What about all these books that tell you how to get your baby to sleep? eat? poop? What about those, Rachel? Can't you read? What are you doing with your English major anyway?" Okay, so there are books. First of all, I would just like to say that I have yet to find the book that meets the needs of the sleep deprived parent, i.e. is a single page, numbered #1-5 with the steps you need to take to solve your problem in size 42 Century Gothic. Most of these parenting books are super long, super jargony, and super wishy washy about what solution will work for your baby. They're all, "This may or may not work." and "You may need to try different things." This is the worst thing a book can say because you know what they're really saying? "Guess and check, bitches!"
Guess and check first reared its ugly head for me when Leo was a baby. I had been feeding and napping Leo pretty much whenever he wanted, but all of the sudden I had to go back to work and Eric was going to be home with him for a week. Eric was adamant about putting him on a schedule and I was very adamant that it was never going to work and that Leo would be miserable and that our lives would devolve into all three of us eating our own feces. Eric said, "Why don't we give it a try and see how it goes?" In other words, "Pour me a G & C with a twist of lemon, please," Today, on our second kid, those words look totally reasonable but with first kid...not so much. After a long intense argument that may have involved throwing mail, Eric won out and guessed...and it worked! Leo got on a schedule and it was the best time of our lives! #38 smackdown!
However. HOWEVER. Despite the success of guess and check(because, let's be real, it usually does wind up working), this method has not become any easier for me. I still want a formula that says x + y = z. I want to know instantly why Seth is crying or how to get him to sleep through the night or what Leo wants when he is screeching high and what he wants when he is screeching low. Sure, there is some glory when you guess and check and guess and check and finally, FINALLY, you get it right. But, I would trade that glory in a second for somebody, something, telling me the answer. I for sure would have never cheated on the SATs, but parenting? Slide that piece of notebook paper right over here. I'll pay you in gum later.
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